San Giorgio Maggiore at Dusk was the perfect backdrop for our wedding photos. After our nuptials in the Ridotto Ballroom, we hopped in a private boat with our crew of photographers, and sped across the famed lagoon.
The 16th-century Benedictine church, a basilica in the classical Renaissance style, can be seen from the gondola lined shores of San Marco. Its gleaming white marble has inspired artists for centuries. Think Claude Monet, Canaletto, and Francesco Guardi. Each of them have created multiple paintings capturing the magical and ever changing light in Venice.
This Palladian landmark was designed by Italian Renaissance architect Andrea Palladio. Begun in 1566, it took nearly 50 years to complete. Palladio was inspired by the formal classical temples of the ancient Greeks and Romans, focusing on symmetry. He adhered to the principles of classical Roman architecture, based on mathematical proportions and an absence of rich ornamentation.
The first church on this island was built in 790. In 982 the island was given to the Benedictine order by Doge Tribuno Memmo. The Benedictines founded a monastery there, however, all of the buildings were destroyed by an earthquake in 1223. The church and monastery were rebuilt after the earthquake.
In the photo above, you can see the Doges Palace on the shores of San Marco, as seen from the island of San Giorgio Maggiore. The water ways have been an essential part of Venice’s history. The 11th century was Venice’s first golden age of maritime power, reaching its peak in the 17th century with nearly 190,00 citizens. By the 18th Century, all of that had changed. 1797 marked the Fall of the Republic of Venice at the hands of Napoleon Bonaparte and Habsburg Austria.
It’s difficult to comprehend a civilized island with a 1300 year history… but here we are. We are beyond thrilled and blessed to have experience such a beautiful moment in the long arch of history in Venice.
When is a gay wedding more than just a gay wedding? When your husband to be has had a 30 year dream of getting married in Venice, Italy since the age of 11. Love means you’ll do just about anything to make it happen. After all,isn’t that what love is about, making your fiancésdreams come true. Our worldly guest list included friends from Chicago, Texas, Washington, California, Fiji and Australia. Yes our peeps flew half way around the world for us. #Blessed
After our glorious nuptials under the baroque fresco, we wanted to give our guests a fun photo op while the Ridotto Ballroom was being redressed for dinner. We’d designed our own step and repeat and had it installed in the adjoining Crozzola room. We added a prop table that included an assortment of Venetian masks and Chinese fans. ‘Dynasty poses’ are something we adore doing in our photo ops. Strike a pose, throw in a little attitude, and viola!
Once the Ridotto was reset, our guests flooded back in, found their tables, and prepared for the continuation of the festivities. Recio and I burst into spontaneous dance as we re- entered the ballroom and made our way to our table. Recio decided to throw in a little twerking, and our guests went wild.
As the evening progressed We had many of the traditional moments. Our first dance, speeches from our best men, our personal speeches, a champagne toast, and the cutting of the cake.
The cutting of the cake was a moment that we couldn’t wait to share with our guests, because we had a little surprise in store for them. We, yes Recio and I, were the cake topper. My best man David Stanko had taken us to Doob 3D as a wedding gift. In their photo studio we held a pose in a round room, filled with 75 cameras. A single flash gave them a digital 3D file. Six weeks later we received our little statue in the mail. It was a total show stopper!! After the big reveal our guests were jockeying to take photos of it, especiallywith the two of us standing behind it. Even the Hotel staff lost their minds when they pulled it out of the box… I’d forgotten to mention that it was literally ‘us’ as the cake topper. Thank you David for one of the best moments of the evening, and for helping us make this a spectacular gay wedding.
Well… our moment has arrived. After nine months of planning, it’s finally time to enter the Ridotto Ballroom and join our hands in marriage. We ascend the stairs and join our families. Pachelbel’s Canon in D Major plays, as we’re escorted to the stage, me by my aunt and Recio by his mom.
We join our guests under the baroque fresco with our celebrant, Fabio Moresco. We’re joined on stage by my two sisters, and my best man, David Stanko. Recio’s son Isaiah is his best man, and his brothers Evan, Dillan and Jonathan are his groomsmen.
Fabio greets our guests and begins our ceremony: This meeting and this love are what bring us together today. The uniting of these two friends to establish a new family is an important and memorable event. It brings together two separate families and backgrounds and creates a union that is a sign of hope in the midst of a troubled society.
Traditionally, the passage to the status of married couple is marked by the exchange of rings. These rings are symbols of the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning and no end, no giver and no receiver for each is the giver and each is the receiver.
And now, Romi and Recio have declared before all of us that they will live together in marriage. They have made special promises to each other. They have symbolized it by joining hands, taking vows, exchanging rings and by signing their wedding certificate.
By the authority vested in me by the State of ITALY, I now pronounce that you are HUSBAND and HUSBAND. You may kiss each other!
The room explodes in applause and we exit the stage to our favorite song… the DYNASTY theme song. There may have been a few laughs too.
We are so grateful to all of our friends and family who traveled half way around the world to join us, bearing witness to our nuptials. As it turns out, our wedding was the first gay wedding held in the Ridotto Ballroom. As I mentioned earlier, this was the first casino in all of Europe where famed ladies man Casanova gambled and smoked opium with courtesans, before being tossed into jail for not paying his gambling debts. It was was also the seat of the French embassy after being conquered by Napoleon Bonaparte in 1797, and lastly a glamorous ballroom during the Austrian Empire. Therefore, we were a historic wedding, in a historic space. Love wins is not just a hashtag, but a way of being. Thank you Venice for treating us so beautifully and making us feel like family. You will forever be in our hearts.
Our 8 hour wedding event began with a 30 minute gondola ride before arriving in Piazza San Marco. Our gondolier took us out into the Grand Canal, passing by the Basilica di Santa Maria della Salute, a masterpiece of Baroque architecture built in 1687. We turned onto a smaller canal enjoying the tranquility of the nearly empty canals before arriving back at the Hotel Monaco and Grand Canal. It was our private time to reconnect, to get centered, and to remind ourselves to stay in the moment. We wanted to be present and take in all of the beauty that was about to unfold.
Once on solid ground we walked over to the Piazza San Marco, mixing with the tourists on the street. Everyone around us could feel the excitement and the magic… because these bespoke chinoiserie tuxedos weren’t about to be ignored.
We stopped in front of the Good Luck Centurion… because it’s good luck to touch his belly.
From there we entered the famed Piazza. Walking hand in hand took on a new meaning as we passed by tourists. Some smiled and waved, some took photos, and some seemed a bit startled. This little square draws people from all around the world… I had to wonder, was gay marriage legal where they were from? In that moment, I realized that we were making a political statement. A huge statement. So much larger than I’d ever imagined. I wasn’t trying to be a political activist, just a guy marrying the guy he loves. So I held his hand a little tighter, and was grateful for this extraordinary opportunity.
We paused in front of the Doge’s Palace to take in the beautiful views of the Lagoon. It was the perfect mid September day, not to hot and not to cold. The iconic gothic details date back to 1340 and are recognized around the world. I feel so lucky that we could have this beautiful moment in front of it, becoming apart of its nearly 700 years of history.
We stole a kiss in front St. Mark’s Basilica, the Italio-Byzantine church we’d visited months earlier for Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve. The gold mosaic ceilings inside are beyond breathtaking.
The opulent lace like arches with their gold hues, look a bit like a crown in this photo. I know we certainly felt like royalty on this day. Once we were finished in Piazza San Marco, we headed over to the Ridotto Ballroom to begin our fairytale wedding…
One of our wedding photographers, Andrea Rizzo, created this stunning video of the empty streets and canals of Venice, during initial lockdown due to Covid19. We hope you’ll watch it, it’s breathtakingly beautiful.
Designing a Venetian Wedding is no small task, especially when you’re doing it from half way around the world. Since there’s no room for error, everything must be thought through as completely as possible.
Begin with a solid floor plan. You’ll need to be clear on how you want to move through the space. Where will you sit? How do you want your guests to see you? What will be behind you? A mirror, a draped window, a baroque water fountain? Think about what will happen when the camera’s flash. Will your photo white out because of the glass window or mirror behind you reflecting the flash? You’ve only got one chance to get it right, so it’s important to minimize the possibility of mistakes. These drawings were my springboard for the event. They helped me decide on things like lighting, fabrics, candelabras and even camera angles.
Our wedding took place in a renowned historic space in Venice, Italy, the Ridotto Ballroom. Located in the Hotel Monaco and Grand Canal, it sits on the edge of the famed lagoon and faces the Basilica di Santa Maria della Salute. Built in 1638 by the Dandolo family, the public gaming room was Europes first casino and was frequented by famed ladies man Casanova. We love this space, and what makes it special to us is the authentic Baroque ceiling fresco. It’s very similar to one that hangs over the shampoo bowl of my hair salon in the Hancock Park neighborhood of LA.
The wedding decor was guided by the two color palettes in the room: The warm tones of the terrazzo floors, peach walls and gold trim, and the cool tones of the ceiling fresco. The ceiling fresco is the focal point of the room, and I wanted to bring that color down to eye level by covering the table tops in an iridescent ice blue fabric. After weeks and weeks of clipping fabric samples from nearly every fabric store in Los Angeles, I created these sample boards of colors.
I wanted a little something ‘extra’ for the guest tables. So I chose one of my original floral paintings and had it printed onto fabric. After finding the right fabric that wouldn’t wrinkle or curl up, it was cut it into a circle and trimmed with gold fringe. I chose tall candelabras for the tables because of the ceiling height. I had the flowers arranged not at the base, but up towards the top by the candles. This allowed the guests to be able to see across the table and again helped add volume higher up in the room.
I also created accent pillows from my original bird paintings, trimmed them in fringe, and then tossed them around the room for added color. I wanted to capture the feeling of an imaginary Venetian garden with birds, butterflies, and flowers.
Construction of all of these items took far longer to complete than I expected. My seamstress was working at her own pace… perfection takes time. I’m so glad that I gave myself extra time for these bespoke items. Ultimately it was worth the wait.
I chose Venetian masks and Chinese fans as party favors. I knew the room might be hot… and it was. The fans were a life saver for this elegant soiree.
The final factor for the wedding was the lighting. As you can see above, the marble columns and inset panels are very grey during the day. Because our event was going to be 8 hours long, we needed to create a continuous mood throughout the event. I wanted it to glow with warm pink tones late into the evening. Thanks to digital lighting effects, we had exceptional mood lighting for the entire evening.